


Staring Down the Barrel of a .45

by PandaoftheInquisition



Category: Red Dead Redemption (Video Games)
Genre: F/M, Logan Micheals - Freeform, Original Character(s)
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-11
Updated: 2019-06-12
Packaged: 2020-04-24 12:16:16
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 3
Words: 9,905
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19173097
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PandaoftheInquisition/pseuds/PandaoftheInquisition
Summary: Seems the Wild West is coming to a close. Only a few gangs survived on past the good old days. Before the Pinkertons. Logan Micheals must now choose what she is loyal to.(Red Dead Redemption Original Character Story)





	1. Prologue: Blessed Are Those Who Hunger

Her belly grumbled. It twisted and knotted inside of her in its usual attempt to tell her that her body needed to eat. But it did little when there was nothing to eat. Not since she was so ruthlessly tossed out on her own. Well…not exactly tossed out. More like…she was forced to live on her own. Her father and mother no longer lived, thus she had to figure out the world on her own.

_I gotta find somethin’ to eat_ she thought to herself. She had scavenged the land for how many months now? No town wanted her there, not even when she tried to tell them about what had happened. She was lucky enough to run from another group of men that were with the first. O’Driscolls they called themselves. They were worse than rabid wolves. And if they got a hold of her…well…they would be less than gentlemanly towards her. The only thing that this young woman had was her father’s teachings. Understand the land. Work it to her advantage. What little teachings he was able to give her anyway. That is the only reason she was able to survive for this long…

Another groan came from her stomach and she gripped the dirty button shirt she wore. The pain in her stomach was greater than anything she had ever had to experience. Being beaten for thievery was better than this. If only she didn’t leave her gun…she’d have been able to go hunting…now she had to resort to stealing. She looked around for a mark. Anyone that would have enough money for her to get something to eat. If she was lucky, maybe enough to get a hunting rifle. But that was only if she was really lucky. She spotted one man. Dark hair, dressed well, and a walk that showed he was confident. Confidence often made you a target. This young woman was very well aware of that. Calmly, she let the man walk in front of her. Didn’t beg, didn’t ask for anything. Just waited. She got up normally, reached her hand out and took whatever billfold was in the man’s pocket. It would have worked…had strong fingers wrapped around her wrist.

“What’s this we have here?” the man asked. His eyes were dark, just like them O’Driscolls. Terror and the need to survive overruled anything that ran through her head. She lashed out one fist and made contact with the man’s face. His grip loosened enough for her to make her escape. She didn’t care who shouted after her. She just had to get away. 

Around a wooden house she ran, only into a fence. Panting, she looked for some sort of escape. She turned to see two other men after her. She looked around for something to climb. Anything to get herself out of this situation. She found perch in the log siding of one house and climbed up and over. Once she had landed she ran. She ran and ran and ran. She ran into the woods. Ran until her legs couldn’t run anymore.

“Damnit!” she shouted. Breath never seemed to fill her lung. Her hands rest on her knees as she struggled to recover from her run. The sky was turning colors. From blue to the orange red of twilight. Another day without food. The young woman nearly sat down. Thank God she didn’t. The sound of hooves approaching stopped her. Determined to not get caught, the young woman ran further into the brush. She went into the trees, thick brush, and tried to lose her pursuers. But those trees disappeared and turn into a camp. With a fire, and people around it. A young boy, maybe her age, pointed a gun at her. 

“Who the hell are you?!” he demanded. The young woman could barely talk between pants.

“Damnit, someone found us,” a woman snapped up. There was no time to answer. The young woman couldn’t catch her breath long enough to answer. The older woman held a shotgun in the crook of her arm. The young woman watched as yet another barrel pointed in her direction. 

_This is where I die_ the young woman thought to herself.

“Calm down. Everybody, just calm. Down. Can’t you see this woman’s runnin’?” a man asked. He had darker hair, black hair. Well kept. He dressed with the style of a rich man, kinda like her recent failed mark. There was a cigar in his hand that was freshly lit. She watched as he approached. One foot stepped back. She was ready to bolt…but to where?

“Darnit, where’d that brat run off to?” someone shouted in the distance. The young woman looked behind her for a moment with worry. She really was going to die here. If it wasn’t from her pursuers, it would be from these people. 

“Come here, kid,” the man offered a hand. The young boy looked a little irate, but he lowered his gun, as did the older woman. Hesitation filled her for a moment, until the sound of thundering hooves changed her mind. She walked towards him briskly. His hand snaked out and pulled her from her shoulder. He placed her behind him as two riders appeared.

“Y’all see a brat right through here?” the rider demanded.

“There she is!” the other shouted and pointed an angry finger at her. The young woman wanted to duck behind her apparent savior. But she refrained. All she could do was watch as the horses danced around, ready to run at the first chance they had.

“Gentlemen, gentlemen. Please, what has this young woman done to deserve you chasin’ her?” her new protector asked.

“That bitch wanted to steal my money and then assaulted me,” the angry rider snapped. The young woman peered out from behind the man in front of her. She could see that she busted his nose. A slight sense of satisfaction turned the young woman’s worry into a slight smile. She watched as his horse danced around underneath him. It pulled at the bit, demanding to get away from there. That behavior was bleeding over to the other horse. That’s when she turned to the young boy.

“If you want them to go away, shoot that gun over the horses,” she whispered over to the boy.

“Are you nuts?” he asked her. The young woman didn’t ask questions. She was quick to grab the gun and point it right about the animal’s head. One fire was all it took to make the horse half rear. Both of them snorted and stamped the ground until they turned tail and fled with their riders. A dreadful silence fell and the young woman lowered the gun slowly. The boy took the gun out of her hands with a yank. Eyes watched her as she slowly backed away from them.

“Don’t you think that was a little rash?” the man asked as he turned around to her. The young woman looked up at him without fear.

“No,” she answered. “They would beat me sooner, or turn their own guns on you.”

The older man looked over at the woman and then down at her.

“What’s your name, kid?”

“…why should I tell you?” she returned the question. There was a smile on his face. Amused. He knelt down to her level. Eye to eye. 

“It’s only polite when making conversation,” he explained calmly. He had a point. The young woman looked at the man. She debated over and over and over again in her head on what to do.

“…Logan…Logan Micheals,” she answered cautiously.

“Dutch, Dutch van der Linde,” he said. He held out a hand. Logan looked down at it. Mistrusting.

“Mistrust is good, but I ain’t out here to hurt you,” Dutch said. Logan looked up at Dutch for a moment and cautiously extended a hand. He gripped it firmly and shook it. 

“Now that we are acquainted. What are you doing out here, all on your own?” he asked her. 

“I ain’t got no where else, mister,” Logan answered. Dutch nodded. Logan’s stomach growled loudly. She gripped her stomach without looking away from Dutch. He looked like he pitied her.

“Let’s get you something to eat first,” he said. That was the start of Logan’s new life.


	2. The Coldest May

Logan sat at the helm of a wagon. Snow pelted them from all sides. The wind wasn’t much better either. In fact, it seemed dead set on trying to blow over their wagons if the snow didn’t crush them first.

“Hyah!” she shouted at the horses. They stopped for one moment, a moment that could get them stuck out in this weather. They didn’t need to get stuck out here now. Not with the Pinkertons right on their heels.

“This storm is gonna kill us all,” she muttered under her breath. Even her winter coat and gloves were doing little to keep the bite of this blizzard out. Logan rubbed her hands together to try and warm them up. Maybe, if they ever get out of this mess, she’d go hunt a wolf and make better gloves…a better coat…hell it was May! This snow storm shouldn’t even be happening.

“Davey’s not gonna last much longer in this!” Abigail called up to her. Logan looked behind her for a moment with sad eyes. 

_I knew there was something wrong with that job_ Logan thought. She looked back ahead to search for the Reverend. Damn snow just made everything a few feet in front of the horses white.

“Reverend!” she shouted. The wind just seemed to eat her words. But he apparently heard her. The one time that drunken bastard actually hears her. He hopped behind her and spoke with Abigail in hushed tones. Logan had to concentrate on the road ahead of them. Whatever was said, the priest hopped off and walked ahead to Dutch’s wagon. It slowed to a stop. Logan could barely see what was in front of her face, even the lantern ahead was nearly covered by the blinding snow.

“ ‘bout damn time,” Logan muttered when she saw the wagons start to move. They drove what seemed like ages before they came to an abandoned mine town. It was at least put something between them and this freezing snow. By the time they got Davey in and orders barked, he was already gone. Logan held up her lantern. She could see the man was still. Eerily so. Logan’s face fell a little, as did her lantern. She knew he wasn’t going to make it. Didn’t make the knowledge of his passing hurt less.

“What are we gonna do? We need supplies,” Hosea turned to Dutch. 

“First of all you’re gonna stay here…and you are gonna get yourself warm,” Dutch replied. “Now, I sent John and Micah scouting out ahead.”

“Arthur and I, we’re gonna ride out. See if we can find one of ‘em,” he finished. 

“In this?” Arthur replied.

“I’ll go if you won’t,” Logan suggested. Despite her body shivering with the need to warm up, she was ready to get out there and fix this. There were people that were counting on a place for shelter, and this wasn’t going to protect them. Not if the government could get through this snow.

“Not after Autumn’s passin’, you ain’t,” Arthur retorted. Logan gritted her teeth. Loyal horse, Autumn. Always seemed to know what Logan wanted out of her before Logan knew. To die like she did in Blackwater…it still pained her even more than Davey. Bastard had a mean drinking streak.

“I can ride more than one horse,” Logan muttered angrily. But she didn’t wait to hear an answer. All she did was start to take care of the other horses. They needed to get the hell out of this weather just as much as they did. And if they died, they would have less supplies to care down this God forsaken mountain. She pulled them from the wagons, led them to a barn that was just outside passed the house that everyone gathered in.

“Easy, easy,” Logan calmed the horses. They were exhausted. Didn’t matter if they were in a little shanty or warm barn, so long as they were not pulling those heavy wagons no more. 

“Well get out of this. Just you rest,” Logan murmured to one of the horse. She wouldn’t share her worries…not when they had yet to get out of her alive.

~

A few days passed and the weather had yet to relinquish its hold on this place. Logan looked out the window as she stood in the same shack as the other women. Jack sat by the fire, Abigail worried over Jack.

“He ain’t been seen in days,” she said. “The weather ain’t let up.”

“He’ll be fine, Abigail,” Logan said without looking away from the window. The wind whistled and shook the glass. No one in this weather was truly, fine, as she had put it. But she wanted to say it to put everyone’s fears at ease. 

“He’s strong, and smart,” Tilly said in an attempt to console Abigail. Logan snorted with a small grin while Abigail only agreed to the strong part. Arthur walked in and added more wood to the fire. Abigail made conversation with Arthur. Tried to butter him up before asking what was on her mind. Logan hated that. Arthur could see right through it.

“John’s been gone a while,” Logan piped up. Arthur looked over at Logan. She turned her head and looked over at him. 

“Little John…” Arthur said. “He’s got himself caught into a scrape again.”

“He ain’t been seen in two…” Abigail started to raise her voice. “…two days.”

“Your John’ll be fine, he may be as dumb as rocks and as dull as rusted iron, but that ain’t changing because he got caught in some snowstorm,” Arthur then said. His tone was a little harsh, but they were all working on little sleep and more worry.

“At least go take a look,” Hosea then said calmly. “Javier? Logan”

Logan rolled her eyes but stood up and adjusted her coat. Of course it would be up to her to go out and look for the unlucky boy. They were near in age and practically grew up together. Plus, she’d taken a shine to Jack. His heart would break if anything happened to his father.

“Will you two ride out with Arthur to take a look for John?” Hosea asked politely. Logan knew he was spinning them. Especially after commenting that Javier and Arthur were the two best fit men they had.

“Good thing I ain’t a man,” Logan muttered.

“You ain’t even got a horse,” Arthur argued. Logan’s eyebrow rose at that comment.

“Yeah, but you don’t know how to track in this damn snow, and neither do you. Being from a place with much less snow,” Logan pointed to Javier. He chuckled a little bit.

“Been here lot longer than you think,” he said. Logan scowled at him. Still, did not stop Logan. She needed to get out of here. Do something. Waiting around like this was going to make her go crazy.

“Now?” Arthur asked as he turned to Hosea.

“Well…we all are…pretty worried about him,” he said.

“If our situation was reversed, not that I’m saying it ever would, he’d want to look for us,” Logan said. She headed for the door and waited for the others to follow. They walked to the horses and checked their gear. Logan waited for Javier and Arthur to mount up. She figured Arthur would offer a hand for her to ride, but he’d yet to really bond with his horse. Javier was actually the one to extend a hand.

“Madam,” Javier said with his best romantic tone. Logan gave one chuckle.

“Ain’t happening,” Logan said with a warning.

“I would never dream of it,” Javier retorted. He reined his horse and urged him to walk on.

“This way. Last I know, John was headed up the river,” Javier said.

“For all we know…he kept riding north and never looked back,” Arthur shouted over the howl of the wind. Logan gave Arthur a dry look.

“Not in this weather he wouldn’t,” Logan said. “That’s a death sentence.”

The horses pushed through the snow. Logan could hear them grunting with the strain. The wind threatened to blow their hats off. The chill threatened to freeze them where they sat. Logan kept her eyes to the ground for any tracks that would be John’s. Damn this snow. It would have covered everything in the two days John had been out. Things did not look good for John.

“Hey, I see some smoke. Come on, let’s take a look,” Javier said. Logan looked up to see a break in the wall of clouds around them. A sliver of gray rose up into the sky. 

“Let’s hope it ain’t more O’Driscoll’s boys,” Arthur warned. Logan hoped it weren’t. They were in no shape to have a shootout. Not in this weather, and certainly with how low they were on supplies. They rode up the hill and there was a campfire still smoldering. Logan hopped off and looked over the camp. Things were tossed about, battered by the wind or someone who tried to leave in a rush. She placed a hand over the embers. They were still warm.

“Ain’t been that long,” Logan said. Javier pointed over in the distance.

“That way,” he said. Logan looked over in that direction and could see tracks. They weren’t so distinct but they were tracks none the less. 

“Tracks lead to the river,” she said as she got behind Javier. 

“And they continue that way,” he added as they crossed the river. Boaz pulled at the reins and shied before hitting the water. It must have been freezing.

“Tracks are easier to see when the wind ain’t blowin’,” Logan teased lightly. None of these boys could track like she could. Well…maybe Charles.

“You think it’s John?” Arthur shouted at them.

“You tell me,” Javier replied.

“Their horse tracks, means it could anyone,” Logan added as she watched the tracks. “Anyone crazy enough to be in this.”

“Let’s just see where they lead,” Javier said. He spurred Boaz into a canter. The snow was high enough to give the horse reason to half leap through it. Even her Autumn would have struggled. Hopefully the horses wouldn’t tire out quickly. The only sounds so far were the soft thud of hooves cantering and the howl of the wind. 

“So…you were there, Javier,” Arthur called. “What really happened on that boat?”

To have everything fall apart as it did in Blackwater…even Logan was curious as to how such a job busted. How they lost so many good people when this was going to be the heist of a lifetime. Just the thought alone made Logan want to turn around and demand answers from Dutch.

“We had the money, it seemed fine,” Javier answered. “Then suddenly they were everywhere.”

“Bounty hunters?” Arthur asked for clarification.

“No. Pinkertons,” Javier said. Logan could feel herself clenching her teeth. Damn those Pinkertons. They’d been on their tail for a long time and they only seemed out for blood when it came to gangs like them. Logan thought they had everything under control. How in the world did they get wind of the heist attempt?

“It was crazy. Raining bullets,” Javier continued. The conversation fell away. Logan understood that. It was a tough topic to talk about. Even Logan didn’t want to talk about how bad things got in Blackwater.

“Might wanna be careful here, there’s a ravine,” Logan said as she pointed. Javier made sure not to get Boaz too close. They didn’t know how much the snow hid from them. And the last thing they needed was three more deaths. 

“Dutch…killed a girl in a…bad way,” Javier then said. Logan looked at the back of Javier with surprise. That wasn’t like Dutch at all. She’d seen him execute many men but women…that…that didn’t sound like him at all. Hearing that made Logan’s skin crawl.

“But it was a bad situation,” Javier tried to defend. Nothing warranted the death of anyone. Only if they were shooting at them first. That was the only time that they should need to put down another life. 

“That ain’t like him, though,” Arthur said what Logan wanted to say.

“It weren’t right,” Logan murmured. The conversation lulled again. Silence was filled by the howl of the wind once more. That is, until Logan could see more tracks.

“Tracks do left, down there,” Logan said. She patted Javier on the shoulder and pointed. Boaz turned to follow, and Javier’s story continued.

“Davey got shot, Mac…and John…both shot too,” Javier continued to explain what had happened. Things just seemed to keep getting worse and worse.

“Sean?” Logan asked. That Irish prick never seemed to let anything get to him. Sure, he was loud and obnoxious, but sometimes they needed someone who had endless optimism to bring the group moral up.

“We don’t even know,” Javier answered. She gave a slight sigh.

“I’m surprised we escaped at all,” Javier continued. “By the time you showed up from the other side of town, we were only just holding on.”

It was a right shit show. Logan could remember the bullets flying from all directions. Hell, she didn’t think she was going to get out of there when both Autumn and Boadicea went down. Arthur wasn’t going to let them die, not there. She could remember him pulling her out from underneath Autumn. Logan swallowed hard. At least her horse didn’t suffer. How they managed to escape, Logan could only guess some guardian angel took pity on their lost souls.

“Bad business alright,” Arthur murmured. They rode around another rock and were nearly knocked off by a blast of wind and snow. Logan curled up a little at the sudden rush of cold air.

“Damn snow’s coming in hard again,” Arthur warned. 

“If this keeps goin’, we ain’t gonna have tracks left to follow,” Logan shouted over the roar of the wind. It was getting bad enough for Logan to curl up closer to Javier. It was too cold to let pride dictate her actions. All of them were doubling over to protect themselves from the cold. The horses struggled against the snow and wind. They also struggled against the steep climb. Logan could feel Javier’s horse struggle with each push. Boaz pulled at the reins and shook his head. They walk behind another rock and got another break. Enough of a break for Logan to peak out. 

“Come on boy,” Arthur coaxed his newer horse. 

“They’re getting’ tired,” Logan warned.

“Yeah…a lot of fresh snow here,” Javier agreed. But they couldn’t give up without getting John. Abigail would kill them if this damn weather didn’t. They rounded another precarious bend.

“I don’t know about this. W…we can’t follow nothing,” Arthur said. He was right. They couldn’t follow nothing. That would be the death of everyone.

“Let’s keep going just a little further,” Logan said. She turned and looked over at him. “The trail might be ‘round there.”

They tried to push the horses best they could. They snorted and struggled with each step. They were starting to get close to the breaking point. The horses would start to refuse them if they didn’t get a break soon.

“Hey, look. Over there, you see that?” Javier asked. Logan looked around his shoulder to see something laying in the distance. Logan’s heart sank. If that was what she thought it was, the chances of finding John alive had just plummeted. Both Arthur and Javier kicked their horses into a hasty canter. All of them wanted to confirm what they saw in the distance. As they approached, they could see that it was a fallen horse. Crows and other birds were picking at the carcass. But they were not the ones to tear into it like a bear or wolf.

“John was riding that horse when we left Blackwater,” Javier said softly. Logan swallowed. 

“This ain’t looking good,” she said. 

“Let’s see if he can hear us,” Javier said. He took out his pistol and fired a few rounds into the air. The horses half reared and danced at the sudden loud sound. 

“Help! Help! Over here!” a faint voice echoed in the distance.

“Damn bastard’s alive?” Logan said in disbelief. She knew that raspy call anywhere. Boaz danced around in a circle before Javier urged him forward. They rode up the cliff.

“Hello? Over here!” John shouted again. It was a little closer. A little clearer.

“It’s coming from somewhere ahead of us,” Javier said.

“Best leave the horses,” Logan said. She hopped down and made her way through the snow. If there was one thing that she knew how to do, it was walk over treacherous terrain. Nothing in nature scared her. Not even heights. She leaned back on the steeper parts of the cliff at a jog. Her hand on the cliff face. 

“Slow up Logan!” Arthur called after her. She wasn’t going to stop for no one. She had her pistol, she could hear John. That’s all she needed in order to find him. He kept calling as she climbed more. At least she showed the best path to get through. The only time she stopped to wait on the boys was when she was able to get herself in between two tall rocks.

“You wait any longer, John might actually die,” she said seriously.

“Damnit woman, it’s too cold for this,” Arthur chided. He shivered and tried to warm himself. Logan only shook the snow off and stood at the ready.

“Or you’re too old,” she retorted.

“I ain’t that old,” Arthur said. He motioned to Javier. “Even Javier’s struggling to keep up with you.”

Logan didn’t listen to their complaints. John was alive, and probably in trouble. They were not. It was clear enough for her to keep going regardless. She was able to do so, so why wait? 

“How you holding up,” Javier asked Arthur after a moment of warming their limbs.

“Miserably,” Arthur muttered as he rubbed his arms.

“Been rough the last few days.”

“Yeah…I know.”

Javier offered some alcohol to Arthur who looked at Logan. She shook her head. 

“I ain’t drinkin’ that poison,” Logan snapped. If there was one thing she steered clear of, it was alcohol. Nothing good ever came from it. Trouble followed it everywhere it went. Just look at any saloon or ask any married woman. Javier shrugged and drank the contents. 

“I’m not designed for this snow…” Javier grumbled after he swallowed down the whisky. Logan would be sure to remember it later. Might use it against him when they were in less dire circumstances. 

“There’s a break in the snow, come on,” Logan said. She started forward. They called out his name. Several times as they climbed up a small hill of snow and rock. Logan was used to the slippery terrain already. If only the snow would be a little more consistent. 

“I’m here!” he called.

“Over here!!” Logan called back. She willed her legs to sprint through the snow. She went down the hill and to a ledge where the shouting was coming from. And there he was. John Marston. A little worse for wear.

“He’s over here,” she called to the others.

“I’m here!” John shouted for emphasis.

“Alright, pipe down Marston,” Arthur commanded. Logan crouched down and smiled down at the wounded man.

“That’s quite a scratch you got there,” Arthur commented. 

“What’d you do? Fight the mountain?” Logan asked with a bit of a laugh. 

“Never thought I’d say this, but…it’s good to see you, Arthur Morgan, Logan Micheals,” John replied. Arthur climb his way down.

“You don’t look so good,” he said.

“I don’t feel too good neither,” John replied. Arthur hauled him up and over one shoulder before he turned to Javier and Logan. They helped get him up and over the rockface. 

“I’m freezing,” John complained. 

“Don’t die just yet, cowboy,” Arthur said. He climbed up the cliff while Logan and Javier helped John to get up. Once Arthur was up they started walking away from the cliff face.

“Best not go back the way we came,” Logan said. She point in the direction of a new way. “Might be smoother this way.”

“Ain’t you a sorry sight,” Arthur continued to tease John.

“Can’t…argue with you there,” John said. He sounded exhausted. Being out in the cold for two days without decent food and in his current condition…Logan would wager any man would be in worse condition. Hell he looked like he had been chewed on by the wildlife here.

“See, I told Dutch you weren’t the right man for this,” Arthur said.

“I’m sure you did,” John replied. 

“Really Arthur?” Logan asked as he turned back at them.

“What? I did,” Arthur said.

“Let’s get out of this hellish snow then you can tell John how much you was right and he was wrong,” she said. Arthur shook his head. There was no need to start pointing fingers at people when they were not home safe. Not that their current shelter in this snowy hell was home at all. It was just a place to put between this biting weather. It was then that Arthur asked if John was all right. He seemed to think so. Logan knew none of them were all right until they were safe and out of this weather. But it was reassuring that John thought he would at least be okay. They walked further through the snow. Logan looked up and saw the last thing that she wanted to see.

“Uh, John…you wouldn’t happen to have made friends while you was out here?” she asked him. He lifted himself up to look around Arthur’s other shoulder.

“Perfect,” John murmured. When strength left him, he lay limply on Arthur’s shoulder. Logan took out her pistol out of its holster and cocked it back, ready to shoot.

Wolves.

Logan was right about John’s scars. It might explain why the horse they found was torn apart the way it was. All the wolves needed to do was wait until they had pulled John back up to give chase once more. Not that they were going to give John up without a fight.

“We’ll distract them while you get to the horses,” Arthur said. He handed off the wounded John to Javier. 

“Better do it quick. I think they’re wantin’ more than just seconds,” Logan said in a hurry. Javier did his best to not draw attention to himself. The wolves calmly and carefully started to walk down the hill that they had stood upon. Logan never took her eyes off of them as she walked with Arthur over to a shelf of rocks. If they could call the wolves over to them and jump up there. They could kill them quickly.

“Over here boys!” Logan called to the wolves. They curled their lips and snarled at them. Logan lifted her gun and aimed. She waited until one of the wolves charged. She waited…calmly…then fired. A bullet right between its eyes. There was no way she was going to get that lucky with all the rest of them. She ran as best she could to the rocks with Arthur and finished off the remaining wolves. 

“Okay, let’s get going before any more of these bastards show up,” Arthur said to Logan. She nodded.

“Guess I’m riding with you,” she said. They ran to the horses and waited on Javier to get settled. Logan jumped up right behind Arthur as they tore away from the dead wolves. John complaining all the way. More wolves came out of the snow like damn ghosts. They snarled and snapped at the horses’ ankles. Arthur and Logan did their best to shoot them away. By the time they got back to the river the wolves had either been killed or ran away.

“That bullet in Blackwater, now this? You had a hell of a time,” Javier said.

“And Arthur always says…I’m lucky,” John grumbled. Logan chuckled.

“I think I’d be thankful it ain’t run out today,” she said. They rode through the river. The horses would have to deal with the cold just a little longer. If they ran through the water, they could lose the wolves. They wouldn’t have a scent to follow and the last thing they wanted was to bring wolves to their camp.

“You know, we’re gonna need to come up with a better story for that scar,” Arthur piped up once they were out of immediate danger. Of course he would continue to pick at John.

“So, freezing, bleeding, starving, damn near getting eaten to death ain’t good enough for you?” John asked. 

“Could make it a bear instead of a pack of wolves,” Logan offered. John sighed hard. Even she couldn’t leave him alone. At least it lightened the doom and gloom that permeated the area around them. The sun was disappearing around them. They pushed the horses to run the rest of the way back. Even as they galloped, John was starting to slouch more.

“Just a bit more John,” Logan encouraged. Both Javier and Arthur called for help. Someone needed to get John in. Abigail was beside herself with happiness. She thanked them and disappeared back into the hut to take care of the lucky bastard.

“You got any other lost maidens need saving?” Arthur asked Hosea.

“Not today,” he replied.

“I got the horses, they need it after today,” Logan said. She led the horses back to the stables and took off their tack. She checked their legs, made sure to take a dry, warm piece of cloth and dried their legs.

“There you go boys,” Logan said. They were already falling asleep where they stood. Logan didn’t blame them. 

“Let’s hope this storm will break…then we can get off this God forsaken mountain.”

~

Seemed whatever guardian angel that followed them in Blackwater was gone from them now. The weather had buried the wagons and their food was running low. What was more, Charles had a burnt hand that couldn’t allow him to hunt properly. Arthur went out with him and got them two deer, but that would only last for so long. It didn’t help that Dutch seemed hell bent to put down the O’Driscolls that were in the area. Normally Logan would agree with putting down those bastards but now was not the time. Revenge was something they couldn’t afford. A tenant that Dutch had taught her. This seemed out of character. Now he wanted to go rob a train. Sure, they needed money, but they didn’t need to poke the bear. Leviticus Cornwall was not someone to mess with. Even she knew that. 

“Damnit Dutch, what the hell are you thinking?” she asked to no one in particular. 

“If you get an answer, would you let me know,” Hosea’s voice asked. Logan nearly jumped out of her skin. Her hand flew to the trigger on her gun before her shoulders relaxed. Hosea was a sneaky bastard, and seemed to enjoy sneaking up on Logan when she was in the middle of thinking. He smiled at her and joined her at the watchman’s fire.

“I oughta shoot you,” Logan muttered. She rubbed her arms to try and warm them. Hosea placed his hands out to the fire. 

“Dutch and the men are on their way to rob that train,” Hosea told her. He’d ignored her comment. Logan did her best to shake her frustration and rolled her shoulders. She looked out to where the men rode out.

“Saw them ride out,” she said. Her arms crossed with her rifle in the crook of her arm. Silence fell between them for a moment. 

“What are you thinking?” Hosea asked. Logan looked over at Hosea then out to the snowy landscape. How could she tell Hosea what was on her mind? She was still thinking about how bad Blackwater was. How it seemed the Pinkertons knew what they were going to do next. Like they were one step ahead of them…no matter what they did. 

“…I dunno,” Logan said. “This robbery…I got that same feelin’ as in Blackwater.”

Hosea gave a small sigh. Logan shifted in the snow.

“Hosea, you know me. I’ve always been bullheaded when it comes to Dutch,” Logan said when Hosea didn’t say anything. “But this is different. This…I don’t got a good feeling, Hosea.”

“I hear you, Logan. You’ve always had good sense,” he said. “But we can’t do anything about it now.”

Logan scowled. That was true, but Logan wasn’t thinking about now. She was thinking about the future. She was probably the only one who thought of it.

_Nah, Abigail does too_ Logan thought to herself. But she trusted her gut more than anything. It was more often times in the right. And if this had a bad feeling all the way around, then there was something to be said. And recently, things just seemed to be going from bad to worse. Logan couldn’t continue to ignore her gut. Especially when some of those in the gang relied on it…and if was reliable…nine times out of ten to be true…then why was she still here with the gang? Why wouldn’t anyone listen to her now?

“So what happened to lyin’ low?” Logan asked bitterly. Hosea shrugged.

“Asked the same thing to Dutch. Seems he’s got other plans,” he said. Logan sighed. This was the last thing they needed. They didn’t need something that would put them on the radar. They just got away from the mess of Blackwater, and they had yet to get out of this damn snow and Dutch wanted to go after a train? It seemed insane. Logan shook her head.

“He’s gonna get us all killed,” Logan muttered. Hosea gave a small snort.

“Don’t let him hear you say that,” he said. But it wasn’t his teasing tone, it was serious. Logan looked over at him. The man didn’t look at her. Logan sighed. Right now, they needed to focus on getting out of there. If their leader was going to get them killed…maybe it was time to look for greener pastures…after they thawed out.

~

Finally the snow started to recede back and the weather started to warm. Logan walked over to the wagons and thought that they could finally get off of this mountain. Hosea and Arthur had also agreed. They started to get things together and packed away. She jumped up to drive one of the wagons as they went down. She had little else considering her beloved partner had died back in Blackwater. Logan thought she might be able to carve or make something in Autumn’s honor. Something to remember her loyal steed. 

“Can’t we go any faster?” Jack asked. He leaned on a box in the back and looked over at Logan.

“If we go any faster, kid, you’d fly out of the wagon,” she said with a chuckle. “And I don’t think your Ma would be too happy about that.”

“But it’s taking so long,” Jack said.

“You got your book? Reading will past the time,” Logan said. There was silence from Jack. Logan looked behind her again to see his face looking sad.

“I left it back at the other home,” he said. Logan gave him a sad smile in return. 

“Well…this new place we’re goin’ to might have a book or two…I’ll see what I can do,” she gave him that promise.

“Really?” 

“Really,” Logan said. They continued down the line until they got to a place called Horseshoe Overlook. They situated themselves and got things ready for a new life. A better life. At least…that is what Logan hoped would happen.


	3. A Cowboy is Not a Cowboy Without a Horse

First light was always something that Logan enjoyed waking up to. It signaled that she was still alive for another day. She sat up from her bedroll and stretched out her arms. She’d been in the gang long enough to get her own patch of land to sleep by herself. One or two fights with other drunken gang members helped to seal the deal. She also refused to conform to normal women’s dress. Skirts and flowing dresses never helped when hunting or getting into a gun fight. Men’s clothes allowed more freedom of movement, and it helped when riding too. 

“Mornin’ Logan,” Charles said to her. Logan offered a sleepy wave and stood up. Sleeping on the ground was nothing new to her. Logan preferred it that way. The outdoors were something she’d taken to all her life. It pushed her to be the best hunter, tracker, survivor within the Dutch Van Der Linde gang. Logan rubbed the sleep from her eyes and finger combed her chocolate colored brown hair. Abigail was already up, coffee in her hand. 

“Mornin’,” Abigail said to Logan. She nodded at the mother and made herself a cup of coffee. The quiet of the morning was something to enjoy, especially when most of her life had echoes of gunshots and shouts from lawmen and citizens alike. 

“The only thing good about the mornings,” Abigail said quietly. Logan gave a small smile before she took a sip. The warm liquid felt good. It helped to wake her up.

“I think it’s the only thing Pearson can get right,” Logan murmured as she took another sip. Abigail chuckled with her.

“It’s a good thing you go out and hunt then, sure he’d figure out how to strip the flavor out of the meat just by lookin’ at it,” she said. Logan offered a smile. 

“The only other person here I trust to go huntin’ is Charles,” Logan said. The man might not have been with them long enough, but Logan respected a man who knew the land, and knew how to respect it. Charles was a man who fit that need for respect. 

“Well…better go out and check the traps…” Logan said. She then emptied her cup and rinsed it out. It went back into her satchel and she went out quietly through the brush. She made sure that the traps were well out of the way of Jack’s playing grounds. The last thing she wanted was for Abigail to box her ears for endangering the child. Logan also didn’t want to put the young boy at risk. Some where by the river, others in the woods next to their clearing. Nothing so far. Logan stopped off by the river and washed her face off. The birds started to twitter and fly by. She watched as they rested on the rocks in the river.

“Logan!” Arthur’s familiar call echoed in the valley. The birds flew off and Logan sighed. She turned to see Arthur on top of a rather tall Shire. Black as night and with a wild look in its eyes. Definitely was not meant for gang life.

“Where the hell did you get that monster?” Logan asked.

“Hosea got it off some guy,” Arthur said. “Goin’ into town to see if we can’t get some money off this guy. Figured you’d wanna see if they had any good horses.”

Logan gave Arthur that look. Normally she would jump at the chance for a new horse, but she was adamant that the horse needed to want to have a rider. A mutual understanding and respect for each other. Plus, whenever Arthur asked her to come along with Hosea, mischief was involved. 

“That Tennessee Walker not good enough?” Logan teased. As she approached, the Shire began to dance. Logan stopped and arched an eyebrow.

“That monster ain’t gonna let me on,” she said. Arthur whistled and his other horse came running down.

“We’ll use the money to buy you a new horse,” Arthur said. “You need one.”

There was a finality to his voice that made little room for argument. Logan sighed and hopped up on the painted horse. He seemed to accept her as a rider, as most horses did. They rode into town with little trouble. Arthur wouldn’t let that giant of a horse tell him anything. Logan was sure the beast would throw anyone that attempted to ride it. Hosea was certain nothing would happen as long as he was close. Seemed he was right. 

“You in the market for a new horse?” the stable owner asked.

“No sir, but she is,” Arthur said as she gestured to the Logan. She dismounted Arthur’s horse. She gave the horse a pat on the nose. The owner arched a brow at the oddly dressed woman but Logan commanded the air around her. She looked around the stable and wasn’t pleased with the selection. A few Morgans, Standardbreds, an Andrennes and one Thoroughbred. Arthur was looking at that one in particular. Nothing here caught her eye. No horse seemed particularly interested in her either. Even as she walked close to the stalls, none of them seemed particularly curious about Logan.

“Got any horses out to pasture?” she asked “I’d like to walk around. See how they act.”

“Ah…” the owner looked stunned for a moment. His mouth didn’t work as he tried to speak words but nothing came out of his mouth. Logan sighed. No man here would think that a woman knew what she was talking about. Logan just learned to accept to do things her way rather than waste time explaining herself. She opened a door to the back and looked at the paddock before her. Some of the horses were kept in separate pens, isolated from the rest of the herd. Something Logan didn’t necessarily think was the best idea for herd animals. 

She looked at a few of them. They danced around while other potential buyers looked them over. Mostly farm hands looking for a steady horse. Not Logan. She was looking for a partner. A horse that she could trust to use its own instincts to get out of a bad situation while remaining loyal to her. Then her eyes fell on one horse. Its coat shone golden in the sun. A dark mane and tail offset the bright golden coat. Tall dark socks crept up its legs as though stained with darkened mud. The horse snorted and trotted quickly from anyone who got too close. Logan approached and then leaned against the fence. It seemed wild in nature, much like a mustang fresh off the plain, but it didn’t have the build. It had muscle, a rounded chest meant for life outside of this tiny pen.

“Ah, he’s not…” the stable owner’s voice spoke up. The horse’s ears pricked forward and it looked over at them. Logan watched calmly before she half tilted her head to look at the stable owner.

“Not what? A good horse?” Logan asked.

“No one’s been able to get close without a bite or a kick,” he explained. Logan looked at him with a slight smile. A horse with his own personality. Smart enough to give an opinion rather than just listen to any rider. Logan liked that. Slowly, carefully, she stepped through the gap in the fence. The horse looked straight at her. His mane that fell over his face moved enough to reveal a single white diamond on his forehead. His body then tensed when he saw Logan. The two looked at one another for a very long time. Logan didn’t move. She waited until the horse did. It seemed like ages until he lowered his head to sniff the ground. Logan relaxed a little. She took a chance and walked two steps closer. The horse snapped his head up again. The process repeated itself. Only this time, the horse didn’t look away.

Logan opted to walk around the pen. Let the animal get used to her presence. The only way the horse was going to relax is if it got used to Logan. And if he was able to get comfortable with Logan’s company. 

“What are you doing, Logan?” Arthur asked. He sounded exasperated. Hosea chuckled a little bit. Logan leaned against the fence with her back to the horse.

“Makin’ friends, what’s it look like?” Logan answered. She had an amused smile on her face. Arthur was the one to sag his shoulders in a sigh.

“He don’t look like he wants friends,” Arthur said. Logan looked back at the horse from over her shoulder.

“Give me some time,” Logan said once she looked back at the two other outlaws. Hosea shifted in his saddle.

“We’ll be out hunting, might be a few weeks,” Hosea informed her. Logan gave a nod and gave a half wave. They were in some dire need of supplies, and if Logan wasn’t out hunting, they weren’t going to have a steady source of food. That and she would be down a horse to bring back any decently sized game.

“We’ll come check on you on our way back,” he continued. Hosea turned his horse and trotted through the town. Arthur came up closer.

“Don’t have your heart set on him,” Arthur said as he pointed to the horse. Logan gave a smile. 

“Why? Because he looks unruly?” Logan asked.

“You know what I mean,” Arthur said. “Can’t be having a horse that won’t listen.”

“I know what I’m doin’, Arthur,” she replied. “If the gang can handle Micah’s mouth, Bill’s attitude, and Reverend’s habits; they can handle a horse like him.”

For added emphasis she thumbed over at the horse. Arthur looked over at the horse and shook his head. If there was one thing he knew about Logan, it was that she would never give up on something so easily. People she might not be able to handle, but animals…she had some sort of magic touch that made every animal listen to her.

“Just don’t get yourself into trouble with this,” Arthur said. Logan half rolled her eyes at him.

“I heard Dutch, I know to keep my nose out of trouble…unlike you two,” she returned. Arthur shook his head and reined for his horse to follow Hosea’s path. Logan gave him one last wave before she turned to the horse.

“Now,” Logan said. “Let’s see what we can do to be friends.”

Logan walked to the horse slowly but the horse walked quickly away from her. They circled the paddock several times. Those who walked by would slow down and watch. But they would move on eventually. But the stable owner was starting to get a little annoyed.

“I have plenty of other horses,” the stable owner said. “This one will only cause you trouble.”

“Wouldn’t be the first time I’d been in trouble,” Logan commented as she leaned against one of the fence posts. She had to let the horse get used to her. There was no use in chasing the horse around the small paddock over and over again. That would only tire the horse out and make him give up. Logan didn’t want that. She wanted the horse to accept her on his terms.

“A horse like this is no good to a rider,” the stable owner said. “He won’t listen to anything.”

“Well…I think he’s not given the chance,” Logan said. She watched the horse sniff the dirt and half relax around her. Or was he just tired?

“Chance? I think he’s had plenty,” the stable owner said.

“You’ve been goin’ about it wrong,” Logan said. “Would you want to teach someone to work by tyin’ them up and tellin’ them what to do?”

The stable owner looked at her funny. He took his hat off and scratched his head.

“Well…no I don’t suppose I would,” he answered reluctantly.

“Then why expect a horse to do that?” Logan then asked.

“You hit your head or something? Horses aren’t people,” the stable owner said with a slight frown and a furrow between his eyebrows.

“Horse aren’t people, yer right,” Logan said. “But they sure as hell act like ‘em.”

The stable owner sighed heavily. Logan looked over at the stable owner. He’d walked away with his hands thrown up in the air.

“If I can get a halter on him, and walk with him with no trouble; I’ll get him out of your hair,” Logan called after him. She knew this might will take a while. Getting any sort of animal to work with you would take the animal to trust her. Just as with people. Just like people… Logan lifted herself from the fence post and started walking around with the horse again.

The stallion walked around the paddock again. He gave a loud whinny as Logan approached. The horse ran off again. This continued for several hours. She let the horse walk around as much as he wanted to. If there was one thing she remembered with Autumn, it was the unconditional trust they shared. Logan needed that trust. For right now, Logan had to focus on introducing herself. No other outlaw in the gang would take this much time with a horse. They didn’t care enough. Or, that’s how Logan felt about most of the members of the gang.

This same sort of behavior continued until the stallion showed signs of getting tired. Logan and the horse looked at each other for a while. Logan slowly approached. The stallion made no indication of walking away. He watched her as she approached. Her hand reached out just enough for her to touch but that is where she stopped. 

“I ain’t here to hurtcha,” she whispered softly. Calmly.

If she knew anything about horses, and she made it a point to get to know all of the horses in the camp, the first break through was allowing the horse to choose. Logan stood there for several moments. The horse looked at her and she at him. Then his nose reached out, his neck extended fully until she could feel the breath of the horse. And that was enough for Logan. She carefully walked forward and touched his nose. The horse did not back away.

“Well I’ll be damned,” the stable owner said with surprise. “Didn’t think that bastard would accept anyone.”

Logan didn’t say anything. She just let the horse allow her to touch him. She patted his nose. Then she moved up and scratched the diamond on his head. There was a moment when the horse closed his eyes and just enjoyed this moment. Or seemed to. Logan smiled.

“You can trust me,” she encouraged him. This would be the start. A good beginning.

~

A few days and Logan was able to groom the stallion. She’d tried to figure out a good name for him but had yet to come up with something that suited him. Since she was able to get him out of the Valentine Stable and walk him all the way back to Horseshoe Lookout. The other horses were curious and crowded at times. Her wild boy would warn them with a kick or a bite. Usually there was a warning nicker beforehand.

“I can’t believe you brought that wild animal here,” Bill groused. He was particularly angry with her cause he was drunk and didn’t hear her warning.

“Wild animal? Yer one to talk,” Logan retorted. The stallion shook out his mane. She brushed his coat. It was an exercise of trust for the horse. He needed to trust Logan. He needed to understand that he didn’t have to be afraid. The other horses around him would help him understand that, but that would take some time. This would help further his trust with her. A hand curved around his rump and down his back leg. She could sense his tension and came back to a normal place. An acceptable place. The muscles relaxed. Logan looked to see his ears swiveling back to her and then forward. 

“Good boy,” she murmured and continued to pat him. Trust. This was the one thing that would help them be partners. So far, so good.

“Mornin’ Logan,” Jack’s voice said from behind her. Logan turned to see the young boy sitting on the stump behind her. 

“Mornin’ Jack. You’re up early,” she said with a gentle smile on her face.

“Well the sun’s up. Can’t sleep with it shining in your eyes,” he said. Logan gave a chuckle.

“You’re right about that,” she said. The stallion didn’t seem to tense when Jack was around. That was a plus for Logan. She gave him a pat on his neck.

“He got a name yet?” Jack asked. Logan looked back over at the stallion then at Jack.

“You know…I haven’t thought of a good one yet,” she admitted to the young boy. “Gotta think of somethin’ perfect.”

“Why not Sunlight?” Jack asked. Logan gave a little laugh.

“Cause this horse is a boy, that’s more a girl’s name,” she explained.

“Your name is more a boy’s name,” Jack then pointed out. Logan opened her mouth to say something but ended up closing it. That was an excellent point. She then looked over at the stallion and then back at Jack.

“Well, Sunlight just doesn’t suit him,” Logan then said.

“Why not?” Jack asked. “He looks like sunlight.”

“Well…he sure don’t act like sunlight,” Logan countered. Jack looked over at the stallion with a slight frown.

“You’re right…he’d be really friendly to be a Sunlight,” he said. True wisdom from a four year old. The stallion looked over at them for a moment before shaking his mane out again and sniffing the ground. 

“Still thinking of a name for him?” Tilly Jackson asked. She walked over and crossed her arms and looked over at him.

“Bouncing ideas off of Jack here,” Logan said with a smile. “Trying to find something to fit his personality.”

“He’s got a personality alright…one to match the rider,” Tilly said.

“Ain’t that a little harsh?” Logan asked with a mocked tone of offence. Tilly gave a slight chuckle.

“It’s a compliment. Means he won’t take no shit from anyone ‘round here,” she explained.

“The Count don’t take shit from anyone,” Logan pointed out. “Last I checked he won’t let no one near but Dutch.”

The three of them looked at the horse thoughtfully. What sort of name should she give this horse? She could keep with the theme of seasons, but most of those did not match up with the stallion. His personality was more free, rough, just like the land around them. He had to have a name that fit that. She crossed her arms and half tilted her head to the side.

“Patriot,” Logan then said. 

“Patriot? I like the sound of that,” Tilly said.

“That’s one vote. What about you Jack?” Logan asked the young boy.

“I think that’s great. Like from one of my books,” Jack replied. Logan smiled and approached the horse. Her hand touched his shoulder and she brushed his fur.

“Patriot…sounds good…hope we can work together,” she said to the horse.


End file.
